(WIP) You can't change yourself, you can just lead yourself

a) You can't change yourself as the way you want. You can just lead or arouse yourself.

b) You can't change them as the way you want. You can just lead or arouse them.

Realizing a) is important because the basis of all communication pattern exist in a communication with yourself.

If you think that you can change yourself, then you might also try to change the others as the way you do for yourself. Then you would face the conflicts with other same as with yourself.